Marriage Quotations for Sobering Up a Bit

There are many sides to marriage, and therefore many sayings about it too. These expressions are in the form of proverbs, amusing poems, aphorisms and other quoted pieces. Here are some 60 marriage quotations for some reflection. Sayings without author names linked to them can be credited T. Kinnes.

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A dress that zips up the back will bring a husband and wife together. [James H. Boren]

A happy marriage has in it all the pleasures of friendships, all the enjoyment of sense and reason - and indeed all the sweets of life. [Joseph Addison]

A man is quite satisfied if his wife is a good cook, a good valet, an attentive audience, and a patient nurse. [A common say]

A marriage talks of heavy investments in a partnership with or without expected returns.

A partnership is also the hotbed to sow thoughtfully in, and in due time handle what might crop up.

A wise persons learns to prepare for the worst so as to forestall it well enough to count for something.

After marriage, once you have a baby, time management is difficult. Your priorities change. [With Kajol]

Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse. [Arthur Baer]

American conditions and ways do not always apply in other countries.

Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives. [Samuel Johnson]

By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. [Socrates]

Fit partnerships could make for great marriages.

Check the main reasons why married couples split. Some parts of statistics tell it. Then make precautions as fit, among other things.

Getting a dog teaches you to be less self-centred, to accept sudden, surprising outbursts of affection, and not to be upset by a few scratches on your car. [Will Staunton]

How do we explain love after two people have been looking at each other for years? [Author Unknown]

How to keep a married life sound? Spend happy quality time together, have happy memories and stay out of trouble. Then, if you are on wavelengths that harmonise with one another, it might just go well. But there is no guarantee it will.

I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance,
A church filled with family and friends
I asked him what kind of a wedding he wished for,
He said one that would make me his wife.
[Author Unknown]

If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry. [Anton Chekhov]

If you cannot afford to get married and raise children or pay the alimony, it hadly pays to drink lots of beer.

It could pay to be very, very careful about who you marry, when, and for what reasons. It could pay in the long run, by well-running family living. Astrologers ponder on the first two things after drawing special charts, and may also evaluate whether the reasons for a marriage look all right - because it has been recognised for thousands of years that it matters so much who marries whom, and when, and so on.

It is not from reason and prudence that people marry, but from inclination. [Samuel Johnson ]

It is not marriage that fails; it is people that fail. Marriage shows people up. [With Harry Emerson Fosdick]

It's terribly hard to be married . . . you have to be an angel. [August Strindberg, A Dream Play]

Life is so short. One had better keep it quite simple.

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. [Samuel Lichtenberg]

Love one another but . . . let it be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping. And stand together, yet not too near together: the pillars of the temple stand apart. [Abstracted from Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet]

There is a market, out there: Some profit from people getting wed; others from their getting divorced, and so on till the caretaker has got his share too. Keep your assets to thrive.

Marriage asks for some balance and at least a suitable partner.

Marriage is good for those who are afraid to sleep alone at night. [St. Jerome, Attack on Jovinian]

Marriage is a partnership too, and family living with lots of stressful events typically follow.

Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce. [Larry Gelbart, M*A*S*H, "Bulletin Board,"]

Marriage requires at least a willingness to live. [Cf. Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966]

Married men live longer than single men, but are said to be more willing to die. [with Johnny Carson]

Marry well and you may in time come to grief over many losses linked to love.

Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but Heaven can't help but smile on it. Hope that.

Men don't settle down because of the right woman. Not necessarily the best one or the prettiest, just the one who happened to be on hand when the time got to be about right - when they are tired. They settle down because they are finally ready for it. [With Laurell K. Hamilton, A Kiss of Shadows; Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray ]

Mother-in-law: a woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers. [Author Unknown]

My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God, and I didn't. [Author Unknown]

Never strike your wife – even with a flower. [Hindu Proverb]

Only choose in marriage a man whom you would choose as a friend if he were a woman. [Joseph Joubert]

Our wedding was many years ago. The celebration continues to this day. [Gene Perret]

Romantic notions about marriage wear away.

Some marry for money they are hardly worthy of.

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook. [Tommy Manville]

Single parenthood is hopefully understood by other single parents.

Strange to say what delight we married people have to see these poor fools decoyed into our condition. [Samuel Pepys]

Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate. [Barnett R. Brickner]

That quiet mutual gaze of a trusting husband and wife is like the first moment of rest or refuge from a great weariness or a great danger. [George Eliot]

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds – they mature slowly. [Peter De Vries]

The ghost of your ancestors stood between you and the person you loved - someone that acted less than honorable. [With Shannon L. Alder]

The night seemed to fade into blossoming dawn, the sun shone anew but the dance lingered on. [Dubin/Frankl]

The older I get, the less time I want to spend with the part of the human race that didn't marry me. [Robert Brault]

The poor man who marries an old, rich widow makes a risky venture some way or other. [Cf Plautus]

The secret of a happy marriage remains almost a secret. [With Henny Youngman]

There is much romantic drivel about marriage and what it may lead into.

There are ample good reasons to awaken a predominantly intellectual wife to wiser fruition that includes partnership with nature.

Three rings of marriage are the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. [Author Unknown]

To be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. [Joanne Woodward]

When realistic handling is called for, being a romantic idiot or full of fads is hardly good enough help along the road to plod together.

Where half of the marriages go asunder, it makes just as much sense to prepare for a good divorce as a great marriage. Where two thirds of the marriages break, it could make more sense to prepare for a less marring and draining divorce than preparing for much else - just in case.

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? [Barbra Streisand]

Wives are young men's mistresses; companions for middle age; and old men's nurses. [Francis Bacon, "Of Marriage and Single Life," Essays or Counsels, Civil and Moral, 1625]